Match Preview 25 March: LADPACK HOPING TO SEAL THE CHAMPIONSHIP DESPITE DODGY WEATHER

Ladpack manager Jimmy ‘Don’t tell me the odds’ Ross-Russell has pubically lashed out at those responsible for the Frank Lee Monday Night 5-a-side League after speculation that the final fixture will again be rescheduled due to weather conditions.

“It’s a travesty. This is what you get when the organisers have never played at this level. Me and the #lads aren’t scared of the weather, why would our opponents be? It won’t change the results. If some suit wants to take the championship from us, they should come up with a better excuse than that…” fumed Ross-Russell at Heathrow earlier after returning from a five day trip to a swiss training camp.

Talented Trequartista Jonathan Pugh added “This is the whole Nani saga all over again. Sometimes it just feels like the powers that be will do whatever they can to ensure top English clubs like the #Ladpack won’t succeed at this level. This is why I hate French people, they are all so racist”

Lad pack sit top of the table going into their final fixture, although CBU are only a point behind and with a superior goal difference, making the Ladpacks final match a vital battle for the title. Having already been rescheduled once, the Lads are chomping at the bit to get going. “[we are] like horny bulls at Springtime” exclaimed Jamie Clarke, leaving the gathered press to wonder if he was talking about their desire, or their unorthodox playing style.

“The boss tried to explain the possible outcomes with scores and that, but I just don’t get it”, admitted Simon ‘Rain Man’ Day. “To be honest, I don’t understand stuff like goal difference, league tables and points. They should just give it to who wins the most. Isn’t that us? I’m sure we’ve scored loads…” he monotoned, before asking somebody to explain the ‘outside rule’ to him and tripping over on his way out.

Only time will tell whether reason will hold out and the lads will get their chance to seal their debut title, or whether The Suits will get their way. No matter what, this is why people for metres around will be talking about the dramatic end to a tumultuous season that will be remembered for weeks to come. Will it be the first title to be decided on penalties? Christ I hope not…

Up the #Ladpack.

ENDS

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